Jokes

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, “Father, may I ask a favor?”
“Of course my child. What may I do for you?”

“Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my mother's birthday that is unopened and its over the Customs limits, and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry
it through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?”
The priest answered: “I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.”
“With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.”
When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.
The official asked, “Father, do you have anything to declare?”
“From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.”
The official thought this answer strange, so asked, “And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?”
“I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman,but which is, to date, unused.”
Roaring with laughter, the official said, “Go head, Father.” “Next!”

go to Google and type

how to find chuck norris

then im feeling lucky

its not a joke but is still funny

gamerben said:

go to Google and type

how to find chuck norris

then im feeling lucky

its not a joke but is still funny

lol its great that

lmao at chuck norris

DO U KNOW Why are Mexicans so short They all live in basement apartments

THATS FUNNY POKENNY LOL

kermit the frog just died of the swine flu his last words were that fucking pig told me she was clean!

just wanted to add this one…

THE LOVING HUSBAND – A TRUE SUPPORTER A man had two of the best tickets for the FA Cup Final. As he sits down,another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him. “No”, he says, “the seat is empty.” “This is incredible!” said the man, “who in their right mind would have A seat like this for the FA Cup Final, the biggest sporting event of the Year, and not use it?” He says, “Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife was supposedTo come with me, but she passed away. This is the first Cup Final we haven't been to together since we got married.” “Oh… I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. I guess you couldn't Find someone else, a friend or relative or even a neighbour to take the Seat?” The man shakes his head… “No. They're all at the funeral.” so true…